Today, a situation arose during a phone conversation that highlighted a broader misconception. One’s communication style didn’t align with the other’s preferences, leading to accusations of being ‘disrespectful’. Despite good intentions, there appeared to be little effort in tailoring words in a way that resonated with what the other might have wanted to hear. This unintentionally fueled negativity, diverting attention away from the shared goal.
Too much focus on the use of word, hearing or choosing them, can distract from the deeper message behind. This doesn’t mean one should only use harsh language; rather, it suggests that we should be less triggered by it and more accepting when we don’t always use the “perfect” or ”right” words. By doing so, we can conserve our energy and prioritize what truly matters.
To quote The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho: ”I don’t know why these things have to be transmitted by word of mouth, he thought. It wasn’t exactly that they were secrets; God revealed his secrets easily to all his creatures. He had only one explanation for this fact: things have to be transmitted this way because they were made up from the pure life, and this kind of life cannot be captured in pictures or words. Because people become fascinated with pictures and words, and wind up forgetting the Language of the World.”
Seeking respect or confirmation through language automatically creates distance instead of connection. This stems from an ego-driven need, which is largely reflected in our society. But how resilient is that society during more challenging and critical times, such as the current climate and ideological crises?
Respect is abundant when one is able to recognize both their own wholeness and limitations, as well as those of others.
Read more about mindfulness